The care and feeding of trolls

I've noticed something in the comics blogs/journals I follow again. Several of you out there are again attempting to hold a real debate with the Irrational Madman-Boy. This is foolish, because he's a troll. All he wants is a reaction. If you link to him, he wins. If you go to his blog and try to counter his "argument" he wins. If you just go to drop an insult he wins. In fact right now, by me discussing him AT ALL, he wins. Trust me, I just spent several days trolling someone here because I was feeling petty and childish. I can recognize the behavior in others...

Now Kalinara and Ragnell both have reasons for including his "point of view" on the When Fangirls Attack link-blog. And these reasons have some validity to them, plus its THEIR link-blog so THEIR rules. But I wish everyone else would ignore him. Me I go to see what insults he's managed to gather with a post, I don't even bother with what he writes, because its such utter nonsense. Who needs the headache?

But the insults most of you are leaving? Don't be like him. TRY. But some effort into it...

Go...I don't know, pseudo-Kirby:

Who are you, you wretched worm, to dare even LOOK upon me? Avert your feeble gaze for I am like a GOD unto you. Return to the muck and slime from which you spawned oh feeble caitiff! Depart now, crawling upon your belly, lest I smite you where you stand!"

Or maybe pseudo-Klingon?

What child is this that dares speak to us? This is a gathering of warriors and scholars stripling! There is no place for a wretched, mewling beast like you here. This discourse is for those who have bloodied themselves in the glorious cut and thrust of debate. We have no time or patience for the tantrums of an unschooled brat. Now cease your bleating, for it like the rancid expulsion of swamp gas. It offends the nostrils of all but signifies nothing...

Or perhaps the vulgar?

Whats your fucking problem now you fucking dog molester? Can't you string two fucking sentences together without fucking show-casing your under-devolped brain? You fucking dolt, maybe if you took one-hand off your dick and stopped jerking off to Turner's crap art you'd be able to type a coherent sentence yourself. Now fuck off you shit-stain before I'm fucking forced to flush you.

Or even this guy:

Al Ewing said...
Hi. My name's Al Ewing. I'm a British comics writer working for 2000AD and Judge Dredd Megazine, and also writing novels for Abaddon Books.

I've spent the last five years of my life busting my arse to work in the comics business. I now make my living off it. That was done through hard work and dedication to the craft.

I'm not a little woman. I'm a six-foot-plus, very hairy man who could drink you under the table twice over.

And I wrote that post, which is an incredibly mild expression of annoyance on my part. Would you like to know how I really feel about you?

Here's how I feel:

Stop.

Just stop. Stop writing, stop posting your crappy blog, stop breathing if at all possible. For God's sake stop breeding, the world's in enough trouble. Just stop.

You are unnecessary, you are embarrassing and you are killing my livelihood, you and all the threatened, scared little boys like you - the strutting, puffing little roosters who make my medium, the artform that I have thrown my blood and my sweat and my tears into while you've sat on your couch and hooted at sports bloopers, look like it caters only to the cast of Revenge Of The Nerds II.

Stop.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go and make lots of money by doing something I love, and you've got to have another of your regular tantrums. Have fun.

Just don't expect to earn anything from the Man-Boy. All a post about him gets is an insult, unless its from someone foolish enough to try and actually agree with him...

Friday Poll: Uses for a drunk

[Poll #1102058]

Have no words

Yoinked from kevin_church