A conversation over lunch
Mar. 28th, 2006 04:28 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lurkerwithout“Ok, what was it this time?”
“I really don’t want to talk about it.”
“It can’t be any worse than the loose towel episode. And besides, I think I’ve got you beat this week.”
“Oh? You think so?”
“Yeah, I do. But you go first.”
“Ok. Fine. So last Tuesday we’re laying BwahahaMan and a bunch of Rent-A-Thugs. He was poisoning donuts or some shit like that this time around. But James and I tracked him to his hideout and jumped them. And we’re just cleaning house when Bwaha nails me in the back with a shotgun.”
“Ouch.”
“Yeah, hurts like a fucking bitch, but the armor takes it. Still, it knocks me to the ground and knocks the wind out of me. Left a huge fucking bruise also.”
“I’ll bet.”
“So I’m fucking lying there and James just goes bug-fuck. I mean lays out the last of the Thugs and just starts in on Bwaha. Leaves him with a broken arm, a bunch of cracked ribs and a jaw that’ll apparently need to be wired shut.”
“Well, that’s good. Means we won’t have to listen to his lame jokes for awhile.”
“No shit. So anyway, we’re the car.”
“The Badger Car.”
“…”
“Yeah, so we’re in the car and we’re heading back to the house.”
“You mean the Badger’s Den?”
“Look do you want me to finish? Seriously, I don’t make fun of your family’s giant fucking phallic symbol of a fucking tower.”
“Sorry. Go on.”
“You sure? Maybe you’d rather talk about the Badger-a-rangs?”
“I said I was sorry. Ok? Just finish the story.”
“Right. So we’re driving back. And James is lecturing me on situational awareness and shit. And not using the armor as a crutch. But I can tell he was worried. And so I’m thinking now’s the time. Now I can tell him how I feel.”
“Uh oh.”
“Yeah. So he’s finished the lecture and I’ve grunted back in all the right places. So now there’s one of those pauses. And I’m trying to work up my nerve. And that’s when he starts talking about hooking up with Alleycat on patrol the night before. Alley-my fucking tits can barely constrained by latex-cat. That HUGE fucking slut Alleycat.”
“They’re nice tits though.”
“…”
