Valerian & the City of a Thousand Planets

Between Leon: the Professional & the Fifth Element Luc Besson has earned a lifetime's credit with me.  But his latest scifi extravaganza is..just not good.  Parts of it are good.  Imagery, setting, weird aliens, cute aliens, goofy background people, Rhianna.  But the story doesn't really come together.  Which isn't helped by the meandering into sidequests of the plot.  And Dane DeHaan's character is both shallowly written and inconsistent in motivation.  And the only other thing I've seen Ms. Delvingne in was the twenty minutes I managed of Suicide Squad, but she is pretty terrible here.

But mostly its the way that the plot will pause to insert some secondary action sequence to showcase something cool.  See Sgt. Laureline Fetches a Psychic Jellyfish.  Rather, than say, just go to where her partner went off-line and start searching for him.  Or Maj. Valerine Meets Rhianna.  Rather than just sneak into the Froggy Aliens castle to rescue his partner (who goes from unstoppable bad-ass to damsel real easy).